In an exclusive conversation with ETimes, Biswas candidly reflected on her experiences in the film industry, particularly her role in the controversial film Bandit Queen, which went on to bag National Awards for Best Feature Film and Best Actress.She discussed the initial hesitation she felt due to the bold nature of the role and the criticism and derogatory remarks about her background. Her parents’ supportive reaction after watching the film brought her a sense of validation.
Chalti Rahe Zindagi has been released. It’s received very good reviews.
During the lockdown, everyone was dealing with different situations at home—some common, some unique. The lockdown itself was so disturbing, depressing, filled with negativity and difficulties, which we witnessed through the media. After that, if someone does some constructive work related to it, it brings a different kind of energy to the team, as the pandemic itself was becoming history. Creating such a story, even though it was temporary, was a lot of fun. We discussed it thoroughly with the team and everyone else. And along with that, we had to take precautions during the pandemic—using sanitizers, getting permission, and shooting inside a building. I had to go outside the building and come back, so overall, it was a very interesting and exciting experience. We had to be smart and take precautions, so it was a unique experience.
And like your character, who has OCD and a need for things to be done a certain way, do you also have it in real life?
Someone asked me that before, and I hadn’t realized whether I had it or not. I was talking to my teacher over the phone, and when I came to Bangalore, I lived in a one-room house, then moved to a two-room house. I enjoyed doing the interiors myself, adding my personal touch, and doing things my way, without the help of an architect or interior designer. I feel there should be a personal touch in it. So, while doing things like that, I used to share my experiences with my teacher, who is like a godmother to me, from NSD. Once, while discussing something about the house, she told me, ‘You have OCD, you have OCD.’ I was like, ‘What? Think about your work.’ Then I started thinking and realized, yes, it’s all about perfection. Things should be straight; there should not be any clutter. When I go to public toilets, I use tissue paper to open the door and flush, then use tissue paper again to close it. Then I started observing myself, and yes, this is what OCD is. I have also noticed dust here and there, and I can’t bear seeing clutter. I do have it, but it’s not very obvious, not at every step. Sometimes we meet friends who are obsessed with cleanliness, and it’s visible in everything they do. They constantly use sanitizers, even during shoots, where you sit for hours, chat, give shots, and wait in the sun. Due to technical issues or something about the setup, you have to wait, and during that time, we don’t think about it much. It’s not that my OCD is noticeable, but it’s there. It’s not a big issue, but it runs in my family; all my sisters have it.
You worked with Manjari Fadnnis in this movie. How was it? What did you feel?
It was great. Manjari is a wonderful actress, and I felt like I was truly her mother-in-law. We were shooting for four days, and it felt like I was really her mother-in-law during the pandemic. There’s also a certain mental state of panic in a pandemic. When different people come together, there’s a certain bonding that happens. Even in the movie, you can see that bonding in the relationship. I also felt like I was working like Seema, as part of a family. She is a wonderful actress and a wonderful dancer, and I enjoyed it a lot.
She mentioned in our interview that she wanted to talk to you more, but she couldn’t talk much because of work and the COVID situation. She said she really wants to learn from your experiences, about your journey from Bandit Queen till now.
That’s interesting; we will definitely meet again. The world is small, and we will definitely meet again. I would love to talk to her, to learn from her, and exchange thoughts with her.
Do you still feel like you have more to learn?
Absolutely! You can ask the directors I’ve worked with; they would tell you that I’m always worried about my performance. It’s not that I doubt the director’s work; it’s my own performance that I’m worried about. I get anxious and tense. It’s not that I don’t understand, but I’m always concerned whether I’ve done it right or not. Whether I’ve done it well or if I should have done it differently. That fear, that tension, is always there for me. Every job feels like the first job. Whether the director is a first-timer or a veteran, my attitude remains the same regarding work and interaction. Someone asked me once if I get tense around other actors, but no, I don’t. My tension is always about my own performance. Luckily, I’ve always had good communication with the actors I’ve worked with. There’s always been a give-and-take relationship, whether it’s with commercial actors in Bollywood or serious, art film actors. I’ve always had the opportunity to work comfortably with them. But I share my worries with very few actors. I do share with some actors that I didn’t enjoy it or that I didn’t do well. But most of the time, I don’t share these things with actors, though I’m always worried and tense about my performance. My concerns aren’t about the actors but about whether I captured the nuances of the character, whether I delivered what the director envisioned. For me, every job is like the first job. I don’t compare or dwell on past experiences, whether they were good or bad. I don’t remember them because what’s gone is gone. Every new job starts from zero for me, and all directors know this about me. When I speak my lines, I stumble, fumble, and that’s how I layer my character.
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Tell me about your experience. How did Bandit Queen start? How did you agree to it?
I was introduced through a friend in Kerala. There was a director named Krishnan who was making a film called Amshini. I was a third-year student at the time, and it was during my holidays, so I was allowed to work on it. We shot the film in Kerala, but I haven’t seen it till today. The script was in Malayalam, and I used to memorize it after being explained. As a student, I had no experience, so I don’t count it as my first film. I don’t consider it my first film because I was just doing it as a student, as a holiday project. Then, in the Repertory Company at NSD, our chief was Manohar Singh, and he told me that Pankaj Kapoor wanted to meet me. So I went to meet him, and he told me about a role in Agle Mausam, directed by Sagar Sarhadi. Initially, the role was to be played by Smita Patil, but she got pregnant, so they were looking for someone else. We had this arrangement at NSD that if the boss gives permission, you can go and work on a film. Otherwise, you could be fired if you went secretly. Singh sir gave me permission, and so I went. The memories of that shoot are special because we were shooting in a new house for my character, and it was like a new beginning. I didn’t know what I was doing, but I was just following the director’s instructions. Later, the film didn’t get released, but the experience stayed with me. I also did Agle Mausam, which also didn’t get released. These were my first two films before Bandit Queen.
Can you tell us about your initial hesitation regarding the bold scenes in the film?
I didn’t tell anyone initially, but then I discussed it with several theater colleagues and shared my dilemma about what to do since the scene was so bold. Everyone said, “What are you thinking? This will make history; it’s historical. Why are you hesitating?” They said, “It’s Shekhar Kapur directing it, so why are you doubting?” So I thought, why not? Yes, it’s bold, very bold, but…
I asked them why they were pointing it out so much. They said, “Because it’s a significant role, and such opportunities don’t come often. You should do it.” I still had my reservations because of the explicit scenes. I thought about how people would perceive it, what questions they might ask, how they would judge me. But then I realized that this film isn’t about glamorizing anything; it’s about portraying reality. It’s not a commercial film aiming for cheap thrills; it’s a serious depiction of a true story. So I contemplated deeply and decided that if I approach it with sincerity and integrity, then I should do it. I discussed it with Shekhar, and he explained the importance of those scenes in portraying the brutal reality of the events. He wanted to depict the harshness and cruelty authentically, not to sensationalize but to tell the truth. This convinced me, and I agreed to do the film. However, I had expressed my inhibitions about the frontal nudity scenes to Shekhar. So he had agreed to shoot those scenes with a body double, where my character is being paraded naked in front of the villagers.
During the shooting, there were many challenging moments. We had to do stunts, and there were instances where I got injured. I still have a spinal injury from one of the scenes where there was no padding, and I had to roll down a slope. But despite all that, I was determined to give my best because I believed in the story we were telling. I treated this film as my first and last. I thought if this is the only film I ever do, I should give it my all. I was born for theater, as I mentioned earlier; some people become doctors, engineers, professors, theater actors, or film actors, and that’s how it happened for me. I focused on giving my best performance in Bandit Queen, and it turned out to be a historic film that marked a significant turning point in my career.
What happened after the shooting of Bandit Queen?
After the shooting, when I returned home late at night around 2 AM, my friend Sourabh Shikha told me that Ram Gopal Varma and Sanjay Leela Bhansali were looking for me. He gave me their numbers, and I contacted them. Sanjay Leela Bhansali met me outside Sourabh Shikha’s house on the staircase, narrated the script of Khamoshi, and gave me the script to read.
Many advised me not to do Khamoshi because the editing of Bandit Queen was still underway abroad, and there was controversy surrounding its release. They said both films would release simultaneously, and I’d be typecast in mother roles. But I felt that Bandit Queen hadn’t even released yet, and I didn’t want to get caught up in controversies. I’m an actor, not a controversial item. So I decided to do Khamoshi.
I believe in following my instincts and choosing roles that resonate with me. When it came to learning sign language for Khamoshi, the producers were hesitant about the additional cost. Nana Patekar and Manisha Koirala were learning sign language, and I didn’t want to be left behind. I had saved about two and a half lakhs from my previous earnings and even owned a one-room flat. I told them not to worry about the expenses; I would cover my own costs to learn sign language. I came to Bombay on March 30, 1995, to start working on the film.
How did your parents react when you told them about your role in Bandit Queen?
When the controversy around Bandit Queen escalated and I completed the shooting for Khamoshi in Bombay, I didn’t give any interviews. It wasn’t because I was scared; I just felt at peace. I approached the film with all my heart, believing it was my last and also my first. Since I was given the role of Phoolan Devi, I felt that I had to prove myself.
We worked on the film with such passion, like a family. I didn’t appreciate the jokes made about me. I told Shekhar Kapur that I wanted to show the film to my parents to vindicate myself, as there was a lot of nonsense written about me. In Assam, some people wrote that I was an unattractive, dark-skinned girl from a poor family who took the role just for money after all the Bollywood actresses rejected it. My fellow actors suggested I counter these claims, but I felt no need to respond. To me, what’s written in newspapers is just the personal opinion of journalists, not a general consensus.
I decided not to make it a topic of discussion again and again in the newspapers. I thought, ‘Let them write; I don’t care. I don’t feel guilty.’ But I wanted to show the film to my parents and siblings. So I asked Shekhar, and he agreed. I usually don’t watch my own work because it makes me uneasy. I avoid looking at the monitor because it affects my acting. Instead, I closed my eyes and rested my head on my father’s lap while we watched the film together. When it ended, there was complete silence. My father Jagdish Biswas eventually broke it, saying to my mother, Meera, ‘Say what you want, but only our daughter Seema could have done this.’ That was all I needed. They never questioned me about the nude scenes or anything related. I didn’t offer any explanations nor did I feel the need to.
Can you tell us about the surprise you received from Shekhar Kapur?
Later, we had a screening of the film in Delhi. I received a call from Shekhar Kapur, who was in a different room at the hotel, asking me to come over for a surprise. I hoped it might be Sridevi, whom I admired greatly. I told my mother, and we went to Shekhar’s room. To my surprise, the gift wasn’t Sridevi but the real Phoolan Devi who praised me after watching the film and thanked me for showcasing her reality with truth and compassion. That’s when I truly felt content.
What was your experience working with Shekhar Kapur and Sanjay Leela Bhansali?
Working with Shekhar was a unique experience. He had a mad passion for his work, just like Nana Ji, Sanjay, and I did. We had many constructive arguments about the script and subtext, and our discussions were always interesting. Shekhar was always looking to bring a surprise element into every scene. Working with him was a great learning experience.
Similarly, working with Sanjay was unique. Despite the chaos and arguments with actors and crew, the final product was always magical. It might have seemed chaotic at times, but the end result was always worth it.
How did your acting career evolve after Bandit Queen?
I was taking an acting workshop and participating in various performances—both solo and group. I worked with some incredible people like Shyam Benegal, Govind Nihalani, Sriram Raghavan, and recently completed Jolly LLB. I am thrilled to have worked with them; it felt like a refreshing experience after a long time. Jolly LLB was a different level of work with a very intelligent and skilled team, and I thoroughly enjoyed it.
I also have upcoming projects with some great teams. When I was offered these projects, I had no regrets or second thoughts. In Bombay, I faced many instances of cheating, with various people like plumbers, grill workers, landlords, property agents, and builders giving me trouble. Even close friends wasted my money. However, in my professional life and film career, I never encountered financial dishonesty.
Although I faced financial crises and extreme poverty at times, my parents taught me to live with dignity and not compromise too much. I adhered to this principle even when I had to live on minimal resources, like a kilo of flour and black tea. My instinct and experience have always guided me to maintain my dignity.
How did you handle the roles offered to you after Bandit Queen?
Regarding my acting career, I never felt that my talent was underutilized. I initially believed that Bandit Queen would be my first and last film because of the discouragement I faced. Many suggested that such roles wouldn’t benefit my career, offering me parts like Anil Kapoor’s or Amitabh Bachchan’s mother without disclosing much about the story or character.
It bothered me because I had always read scripts and chosen roles thoughtfully. After Khamoshi and working with Shyam Benegal, I didn’t take on any roles for several years, except for survival. I encountered extreme poverty and greed in Bombay but maintained my dignity. My instinct told me that living with dignity was important, and I followed that.
What are your thoughts on the representation of women in Bollywood?
I wondered why women’s roles should be limited to younger ages. There are stories about women in their 90s in various global cinemas, but they are rarely explored in Bollywood. Sometimes it feels disappointing, but I believe life is about embracing roles that challenge you. For instance, if offered an autobiographical film on Madhubala at my age, I would consider it a great opportunity, even if it seemed unusual.
When I did mobile theatre in Assam for nine months, I had no regrets despite advice from many directors not to do certain films. They were wise, but I didn’t want to limit myself to just mother roles. Some even found it strange that I was offered mother roles close in age to actors like Amitabh or Akshay Kumar. I took it as a learning experience and moved forward.
I sometimes do theatre, short films, or remain quiet, depending on the situation. I never saw myself as just a film actor; whether working with a debut director or a legend, my dedication remains the same. I approach each project as if it were my first, without carrying any baggage.
I’ve never been ambitious. When asked what roles I want, I always say I’m interested in those that challenge me. For instance, when Shekhar Kapur asked why I wasn’t doing more films, I told him it was because I wasn’t interested in the roles offered. I remember Cate Blanchett winning an award for Elizabeth, and Shekhar’s wife, Suchitra, wrote me a letter saying that the Virgin Queen wanted to meet the Bandit Queen. I met them, and Shekhar reminded me of Nargis ji’s legendary role in Mother India. I said I would even take on a role like Great Grandmother India if it had substance.
What is your perspective on the concept of love and how it relates to your acting career?
I don’t just say these things; I mean them. The concept of love—something Rekha ji often mentions as beautiful and worth sharing—is important to me. Many aspiring actors struggle due to financial constraints, and I view my acting process, thoughts, and experiences as valuable assets. Love is not just limited to one person. It comes in different forms, shapes and sizes in life. You just have to embrace it with open arms.
How do you support young actors?
I see myself as someone who can pass on this legacy to others. Many young actors come to my house, where I have a large hall and shelves reserved for them. They come, take a bath, change clothes, and I store their clothes for them. Not everyone can do this, and I’m grateful for the opportunity to help.
